I am so often inspired by Twitter when it come time to write these posts. Sometimes it is in powerful uplifting ways.
Other times it is not.
Molly read a fascinating article on regretting having children. Now Molly loves her children and sacrifices a great deal to make sure they are cared for and brought up to be fine adults. But if she had it to do all over again, she wouldn’t. This is apparently a bold thing to say, in spite of the fact that no man in the history of time would garner a second glance at voicing this opinion. She tweeted her opinion and of course a man that neither of us know or follow had to get his 2 cents in, explaining, well I am not going to bother with his response because it was just ridiculous about how much better women have it.. blah, blah, blah.
What caught me off guard was the arrogance and frankly the privilege (god I hate that I have to use that word) and it made me wake up a bit to what women have had to put up with their whole lives. Being constantly told that their experiences of being women are wrong. It was truly staggering that this dude would tell Molly her opinions formed by being an actual woman weren’t real. FFS.
My brain being what it is flashed to a musical. My Fair Lady and the scene between Professor Higgins and Colonel Pickering and the words
Why can’t a woman be more like a man?
Men are so honest, so thoroughly square;
Eternally noble, historically fair;
Who, when you win, will always give your back a pat.
Why can’t a woman be like that?
Why does ev’ryone do what the others do?
Can’t a woman learn to use her head?
Why do they do ev’rything their mothers do?
Why don’t they grow up- well, like their father instead?
Why can’t a woman take after a man?
Men are so pleasant, so easy to please;
Wherever you’re with them, you’re always at ease.
It is the obliviousness that the song conveys that carries what I felt from this guys tweets. I will state my stand bluntly here. This kind of behavior from men needs to stop. Stop thinking that you know what it is like in any way to be a woman.
So to all the women, I am sorry how you have been treated and I am sorry if I have ever treated you this way.
P.S. I don’t believe any parent has never (even if only for a moment) regretted having children and women are far more trapped by expectations than men are in almost every case. I look forward to a time when a woman can state that and not be looked on as a horrible person.