I know this is not the post you were looking for today. I am sorry about that, a combination of circumstances have caused me to fall behind in my ongoing tale. I hope you can find it within your heart to excuse this unplanned diversion (detour for the murricans) from your regularly scheduled program.
As I write this my Stepdaughter is “snuggling” me, it is really more like she uses me as a full body pillow and since I run hot and she is no slouch for body heat herself I am just about melting from the heat. She is also an inquisitive child who requires constant feedback and interaction and she is also one of the reasons you are getting this post instead of the one I had planned. Seems I just can’t write dark and dirty posts while being snuggled by a tween.
But I can write about something that occurred to me today. We had a trek into town today to do some shopping and another project (I will leave Molly to tell you about that in her post that will go up tonight or tomorrow) and before we left there was some discussion about her attire for the day, partially to accommodate our project and partially because she was off to camera club tonight. Once the clothing options were discussed and approved the only thing left was the collar. In the end she chose her purple collar that fastens at the back with a lock and as is always the case with the locking collar, she brings me the collar and the keys so that I can snap her in and keep the keys in my possession.
That is when my mind started to think on the significance of what we were doing. It made me think about two things.
Thing one is that I have a pretty hard and fast rule about when she wears a locking collar. Now this rule is all about safety, her safety. If she wears I locking collar then the keys must be right nearby her just in case something goes awry and it needs to be removed. I don’t want her to be in an accident and her to be unable to get it off of her neck. So I paused and thought if this was going to work since she was going to camera club and I was going to be at home. I decided that since it was a thin leather collar and that camera club is really just down the road that the chances of any mishap were low. On went the collar.
Thing two was the keys. Having those keys in my hand as I locked her in made me think about what those tiny pieces of metal meant. That what she was handing me was more than just a set of keys but her trust in me. That she knows she is bound to me in every way possible. Bound in her bonds, her heart, our lives and our duty to each other. What really hit home was that she is truly mine. That she belongs to me in all the ways that matter to me. She may lust for others and maybe even some day love others (I know that other certainly lust after and maybe even love her) but in giving me those keys she gives me the power to decide what happens. About everything. In a way her collar binds us both.
That is a humbling thing. I am not sure that I am worthy and I know for damn sure I will get it wrong. But I know that I need to try to be the man I see in her eyes when she looks at me.
For now, all the rest of you that want her, feel free to lust at a distance, but I need to some time with those keys to figure out how to use them to unlock me too.