Toilet image for Check Please

Check Please



This is a post I shouldn’t write because it won’t do anything except maybe keep my head from exploding.

But you know what? Fuck it, I am going to write on this topic anyway because I am damn tired of other men saying stupid ass shit and making ME look bad and I am going to name names because I don’t (and probably never will) have a good reputation.

I am talking about Essex Lad, and this young man claims to have the keys to, well, everything.

How to pick up women? Check

How to have amazing sex in 5 steps? Check

How to conquer the adult website world? Check?

How To Make Big Money Online With Fake News? Check

How to teach you be be an all around dickhead? Check

Now I don’t care how old you are, you can learn useful things from almost anyone, but sometimes what you learn is what not to do. To quote Oli himself

Older people have a tendency to stop learning new things, as I’m just getting started. So, give me a chance and don’t judge till you’ve experienced full blown Oli ;).

Well there you have it, you can learn from him, but you certainly can’t learn from me. Now I am not really a sweary guy, but reading his site(s) have made me swear a blue streak.

Here is what he thinks about the sex bloggers that are out there.

I set up Essex Lad purely because there’s nothing like it. I read, watch and listen to a lot of the best sex bloggers the internet has to offer and I’d say that most of the time I’m left unimpressed with tips/advice that barely work or translates into real life.

I don’t have anything against anyone making a living. But I take great exception to someone who is, when it comes right down to it, a marketing scheme. He is just throwing shit against the wall and hoping that something sticks.

Here is one of the sites he runs Odd that “Lauren” is also 20 and has lived in Spain for most of their life, all seems rather coincidental to me. (and the site is registered under his name)

Even if I just focus on the Essex Lad site and the advice given I am appalled. It is misogynistic, pick up artist crap that reduces human relationships to gimmicks and games and devalues anything that is not within the realms of his notions of “High Value” relationships.

You might have noticed that I have not linked to his site (and whatever you do, don’t google it) because I don’t want to give him a single click of traffic and seems to be down for the count, but I have used the wayback machine to snapshot a small sample of his site
I don’t want you to think I am picking on the poor lad. I am not, I would call out anyone that I thought was giving the same terrible advice and I have attempted to engage with him on twitter to no avail.

So I make this offer to Oli, contact me however you like and I will setup a Skype call for us to talk and I will record it to share (unedited)with my readers so that you can tell me your side of the story. Because as it stands I think you are doing men, and sex bloggers a great disservice.



3 responses to “Check Please”

  1. I don’t recall WHY anymore but I ended up muting him on Twitter, and I don’t even follow him. What I am finding super amusing right now is that his old “how to become a sex toy tester” article on his essexlad blog listed me, Piph, Kara Sutra, and ohjoysextoys as his “top favorite” reviewers that others should check out and learn from. After getting hits often enough from him that I noticed it in my stats, I checked out his post and finally commented on it, by telling him that he should be educating these people on toxic toys so that they don’t just run off and buy the cheap toys he was recommending they buy to start reviewing on their blog. And then I informed him of the shittiness of EdenFantasys, one of the few places he was recommending that others affiliate with, and I suggested some nicer US ones. then he responded with some kiss-ass comments about how right I was, but never updated the post much to reflect this.

    Now I see on his new “scheme” that “become a blogger” site that he has rewritten the “become a sex toy tester” article and suddenly…..I (and Piph) are no longer his favorite bloggers! And he’s gone back to recommending not just EF, but Amazon for affiliating with for sex toys. If one followed the recommendations he has given, I can’t say that decent bloggers and retailers/manufacturers would be impressed.

  2. I met Essex Lad at Sexpo 2015, having discovered him online shortly before, and (although I wasn’t overly impressed by his stuff) I always thought of him as a little harmless – maybe a little overenthusiastic, a little shallow in terms of content (and with an overzealous blog design), and with the youthful naïveté of believing that he knows all there is to do with sex and is the one to dispense this knowledge to the waiting world.

    As Zak Jane Keir put it at Sexpo, “cute”.

    What’s always irritated me about Oli is the fact that – as you quote above – he seems to have the opinion that, in writing his blog, he’s trying to plug a hole that isn’t really there – that of the male sex blogger with knowledge, something that’s come up a few times recently, with GOTN making a list and several names coming to mind immediately – myself, Justin, Love and Lust, Charlie Forrest… and you, of course, Michael!

    If he’s been trying to add to the sex blogosphere, then all well and good; it’s great to see new bloggers. But, to me, it looks like a large exercise in self-promotion; he’s mostly harmless in what he’s trying to do, but there are a number of PUA-style tips which verge on the sexist on his blog, a lot of sex and masturbation posts which are presented as the “ultimate” guide (which negates the fact that everyone likes it differently) and a distinct lack of content, spaced out by YouTuber-style videos and fancy pictures. I think it makes him look a bit clueless.

    I’ve also read his blog post of today responsing to the conversations that happened about him on Twitter yesterday. I see you’ve set a time for a Skype consultation with him… so I’d be interested in seeing where that goes.

  3. Have noted on the Girl Vs Makeup site the social linking at the bottom of the page is not set up correctly! Oooops!!! Quite the expert then! 😉


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