Sometimes I know what I am going to write for my next post. Sometimes I don’t, I wouldn’t say I stress about it, but it can be a struggle. Today has been one of those days, and I asked twitter what to write about. “Do doms need coffee to function? :P” was one suggestion and indeed there will be a post about coffee some day, but today is not that day.
I also got this request.
Rebuilding sexual/kink contact after trauma/significant life changes
This is a great topic, but I am not sure I am the person to write that post. I have had trauma in my life and I have had significant life changes as well but I don’t think my experiences would be relevant enough for me to be able to speak wisely on this subject. However if there is someone else out there reading who would be interesting in tackling this topic as a guest on here then get in touch. Moving on, it did however make me think and it occurred to me that perhaps writing about stress and D/s might be something I could write about, because that is an area where I have had actual hands on experience.
Stress is a bitch, and it often brings the added fun of anxiety along for the ride. The worst part about it all is that it doesn’t matter if there isn’t really anything to be anxious about, even if it is all in your head it can still roll over you, consume you and leave you lost as to what to do. There are many strategies to deal with this but I want to focus on the one I like.
Neither Molly or I are immune to stress and life throws plenty of it our way. Molly’s response is to become frustrated and can find herself unable to focus, unable to clear her head. I tend to become quiet and withdrawn. Neither of us function at our best when we are feeling stressed. So I spank her.
She always resists and I always make her. It focuses her like nothing else and it does the exact same thing to me. I have to be in control and thinking about nothing else while I spank her and she, well, she should have everything else driven out of her head. Afterwards I find myself remaining in that focused headspace and all the anxiety has melted away, everything seems clearer and easier to deal with. For her (hang on a sec while I ask her) She says
“If I am frustrated and angry, it gives me something be actually angry about, not that I can sustain that anger, by the time it is over all of that has gone. If if I am overwhelmed by the amount of stuff I have to do it allows me to become calm and decide that I can deal with all the other things later”
So there you go, the one simple trick to deal with stress and anxiety that doctors don’t want you to know
Sorry, had to had to slip in that bit of click bait lingo. It might not work for you, but it damn sure works for us. It is a release that can help us both out.
In fact I might be feeling a tiny bit stressed right now…. Oh Molly… 😉
Michael
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