I am slow to anger, really really slow. But I am just as slow to let it go once I have gotten there. I personally think that is fair. Since it takes so much to get me pissed off I figure I have earned the anger. There aren’t a lot of things that make me mad, and while I do forgive quickly I don’t forget quickly.
Molly has trouble with understanding that. She wants everything to go back to normal because she doesn’t like the tension. It is rare that I am upset with Molly, more often it is the teens that get under my skin and that is what most often causes conflict between us. She is cross with them one minute and then after lecturing she is back to chatting as if nothing has happened.
I can’t do that. I need time to come to grips with my anger and that means I don’t want to be around them because generally that just pisses me off more because their contrition seems to last about 30 seconds. I get it, they are teens and therefore self involved by default and often blind and selfish in really quite astounding ways. I am sure I was probably the same as a teen.
At the end of the day I feel I should get to have my anger, I can’t just blow it away like a dandelion seed. I need time to let it cool down until I am back to my silly ridiculous self. And I think that is OK, even though I know that it causes Molly stress, because if I don’t have the space to deal with it in my own way I end up pretending and that doesn’t serve anyone. While we are on the topic, if you see that I am angry, just give me my space, trying to jolly me out of my mood will not win friends and influence people.
On the whole I am pretty damn sure I spend more time being happy, cheerful and a delight to be around.
But best steer clear on the rare occasions I am not.
P.S. They say that teens being obnoxious is a natural design so that when they are old enough to leave you are happy to see them go. I prefer to think that I am setting them free so I don’t smother them.